CITY OF ANGELS

after so long that sentence came back into my mind .. i felt i lost it very long time ago... but when i thought of it. i felt the warmth. no one else can ever assure me that way and make me believe them this way. but after so long. nothing is like the past. the long conversation on phone. the nonsense we do every single day we see each other. the heartaches to see each other cry. the way we worked hard for the same goal. and even nw you assure me by this. it's not gonna work. but you know i love you girl.

don't think about anything but go to bed now. when you are up tomorrow girl , everything will be fine. you know who you are don't you -smiles- it might not meant anything to anyone. but alot to me.

life is beautiful with you;
1:04 PM

Sisqo- incomplete WhooOohOh yeah yeah Listen Bright lights Fancy restaurants Everything in this world that a man could want Got a bank account bigger than the law should allow Still I'm lonely now Pretty faces from the covers of the magazines From their covers to my covers wanna lay with me Fame and fortune still can't findJust a grown man runnin out of time Even though it seems I have everything I don't wanna be a lonely fool All of the women All the expensive cars All of the money don't amount to you I can make believe I have everything But I can't pretend that I don't see That without you girl my life is incomplete Said without you girl ahh Listen Your perfume Your sexy lingerie Girl I remember it just like it was on yesterday A Thursday you told me you had fallen in love I wasn't sure that I was It's been a year Winter summer spring and fallBut bein without you just ain't livin ain't nothing at all If I could travel back in time I'd relive the days you were mine Oh yeah that without you girl ahh I just can't help lovin you But I loved you much too late I'd give anythingAnd everything To hear you say That you'll stay feeling better, finally.

life is beautiful with you;
11:12 PM

argh..... been sick for the pass few days. hmmm. first was cough. i thought i was too worried bout oral so these sickness all came on that day. but i was told that the air outside wasn't good. hmm.. or maybe i'm jus weak. admit it. this weekend i will be at home.. can't go anywhere but i hope i will feel better on sunday. sick people who named someone else as a toy. and now when she got her hey arnold she goes ard saying that her old toy sucks. haha. ridiculous yet funny. juvenile. and it sounds a bit psychotic. seriously i 'm don't care if the real toy itself sucks but if you are referring to him. no one say he sucks.. especially said by someone like you... ya but hope arnold won't be the next one...

life is beautiful with you;
5:13 PM

sometimes life has too many things to explain. till you will start to feel totally sick of explaining every single thing to people. not only one . but one by one . repeating the same thing you said to one then to another. it's so sickening. and when you thought they understand but you are actually making no sense to them. or they are jus aint' paying attention to what you are saying or they don't apppreciate the for of why you are explaining it to them. and if you are the unfortunate one. someone that doesn't know how to express yourself well enough by words it's even a harder task . when you bother to explain but doesn't mean they will bother about you. cause some ppl jus say things for the sake of saying just to make themselves happy and also bulletin to others without actually thinking through, thinking how much their words will weigh. and me, already became someone that wouldn't bother to explain any futher to ppl like you anymore. i tried some many times . but i still can't make you understand. when you tell me you do. ALL THE TIME. it's really hard. but at least i'm still bless with pple that i don't have to say a thing but they know why i do that for. i don't need many. but just a few. (few. .-smile-) but still there's a need to explain. but to pple i truly bother. if you are reading this and if you are someone i tried my best to force words outta my mouth to explain and tell you i care. yes you are the one i bother bout. haha. i'm like ranting all the way from the start. k i shant rant any further. i've been a good girl these few days. haha. self claim good girl. hmmmhmmm-grin. y? i wake up at 10 or 11 in the morning before the sun can bake my butt. i eat my meals ON time. i drink more than 7 cups of water a day. plus 3 cups of green tea and i mean those with tea leaves not those in bottles with sugar.. and the greatest achievement was. haha. (dumb) i did not touch instant noodles for 4 days.-bow. cause i read this report bout instant noodles . but prolly it's too late. cause if getting cancer i will definately be the first one. haha. (: and i didnt eat meat for 3 days. haha. vegeterian... ((: the sight of meat makes me sick.. especially red meat.. hmmm but maybe not really a good girl when it comes to bed time. i know i know. but it's hard to adjust.

life is beautiful with you;
12:56 AM

hmm. today i was like a jelly. when i opened my eyes first thing in the morning. i couldn't get up. it's definately not about not taking my meals. but probably not enough of proper food. -luffs. hmmm. my life is turning totally insane. my body can works longer than what i expected. but i think one day , that day soon to come, i will collapse n maybe spend months in bed.. nothing much interest me today. i look at things i used to like like they are nothing don't feel happy. appreciated or excited over it. fireworks is still fireworks. cheese cake is still a cheese cake. my fav gummi is still a gummi.i chew it then that's it. i dun feel like going for the second one. when maine told me hey look at ann n jon. so bliss together. can watch fireworks together. my face was straight. since fireworks is still fireworks.. it doesn't really matter who watch with who. -smirk- but i know my best friend was smiling from cheeks to cheeks n i felt nothing inside... i jus kept walking n walking and i dun feel tired at all. i do laugh n smile. it doesn't help. gosh. i jus feel like staying home for the rest of the days till i feel better. don't feel like talking to anyone. don't feel like seeing anyone. it gets sick when you do things just for no objective. n today. everything seems to be like that. in esplanade or even anywhere seems like the same sitting down now infront of the computer at home. then next i will just go to bed and have no idea what actually i'm doing today. pointless. totally.

life is beautiful with you;
11:51 PM

i embarrassed myself today on the bus. i got so sick n tired of the songs in my realplayer. they totally sucks n the sound sucks to the core. i chose not to even listen to it. then i fell asleep on the bus for the whole day i'm feeling kinda weak n it's not because of not having my meals cause i ate quite alot today. but it's still the same. hmmm. then the bus kept jerking front n back n uncle made a suddenly brake n i knocked my head against the pole. how nice... then eventually everyone turned n stared at me. tsk. it hurts n it's embarrasing on the same time. i dare not rub it till i alight.. when i thought i can on my computer n get some nice songs. NICE. speaker spoil!. it goes from left to right n right to left. it's so annoying.. grrrr... lene and i cursing to get one . i swear once i get the money to buy one i will grab lene n head straight to the shop n pick it n haha it's mine. now i know how important it is... yes before mig can really get you yours!.

life is beautiful with you;
1:38 AM

hmm. today was like none other than any other day i suppose. went for tuition. then for coffee n tiramisu (: . then met lene. together! where else can we go when i'm with the yoda. yes yes. to the Esplanade. "kampong glam" hmmm. we watched this group of malay ppl rapping n dancing. ha. i should say they are QUITE good. but yes. malay is good in imitating. so yes. take it as a insult or compliment.i dunno. but they with their tight tappered. wooo. they still can shake their bootsy.... -bows. hmmm. then ann came to join us. then we went crapping ard. and i saw my elmo. haha. he got lil goatee. haha. first time. but yes SHAH. you have the genes. you know what i mean. hmmm hmm. then my best khaki malek. n the merajok. fal. haha. but it's nice seeing them cause i really miss school days. i dunno if this is right . but i dun wan any entry battles. girl. you know me n if you really don't get it. yes knock this sense into your head seriously. i know you felt left out. if you come to think of it. everything that i said during we are together i make sure i explain it n i tried very hard to explain it to you and to make you understand. i swear to god i did. n i always try to bring you into whatever topic we are talking about. and i listens to what you have to say. you should know tt even if i don't know your friends but yes i care about how's your life is getting on with your new mates n your boyfriend . that i think that's most a friend or mayb you regard it as a "old" friend can do. i do call you up. but think! did you?. i'm always.. ALWAYS here.. here!! for you to approach me. jus one call away. but you. expecting me to take a step forward n closer to where you are. do you really think this is right? did you ever bother to think of what others are doing? i have clear conscience bout how i take and handle with this friendship. if you think i'm wrong. please enlighten me. yes. i'm not here to blame. but just hope that things will be better . u know how i take you guys as.

life is beautiful with you;
12:41 AM

so thankful you are here. thanks sweet. (: yes the yoda. thank you very much. bewitched yes yes. thanks uh. i was sitting so uncomfortably haha n i actually dropped my bar of chocolate on the floor. i wasn't sure if it's still edible i guess it is cause you finished it. but yea. i can explain cause i was trying to find out using the light on my phone you took it away n jus ate it. haha. but it's ok yea. -smiles. lol. sis was so childish today. totally like a kid trying to make me jealous. dumb. yes i need a mp3 but it's ok if i buy it myself. i jus need it. yes yes miguel is spoiling you! if you are looking at this now.. spoilt brat. ass. yes i'm jealous. you got your motive. -claps.

life is beautiful with you;
1:06 AM

even when it's the dumbest thing done you still smile at it.

life is beautiful with you;
2:30 AM

when i thought life is too good to even put them in words then i paused for a moment n think i should really sit down n do some thinking.

life is beautiful with you;
9:57 PM